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For days I've thought 'I should write in my re-found journal.' This thought is generally followed by such an onslaught of other thoughts that I blink, overwhelmed, and move on to something else. How did I ever focus on one story at a time? There are so many!

Maybe talking only seemed easier in high school and college. To a melodramatic teenager, everything was The End of the World and dramatic or exciting and new and shiny and in need of being explored.

I could talk about my interests. And by talk, I mean shout about All The Feels and post screencaps that encapsulate the glee that words struggled to capture. I remember sharing accomplishments and achievements. I wrote some pieces ten years ago that were horrible and never should have seen the light of day and instead, folks were supportive and the best band of personal cheerleaders a girl ever had. I also remember complaining a lot. I thought life would get easier when we were adults.

In some ways, it just got harder.

I suppose there is a fair trade-off because as you have more joys you have more sorrows, and your successes come with more catastrophic failures.

But ten years ago didn't have wine!


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
May. 14th, 2014 02:19 am (UTC)
Heh. I still have All The (fannish) Feels sometimes, but not as often as I used to, and it seems to peter out faster. Like, I mainlined the first season of Orphan Black, and was all !!!!!, but I didn't feel the need to find other fans and roll around in picking it to pieces. (Maybe that was because I mainlined it, and didn't have to wait a week between episodes. If I had, I might have gone online to go, "Aaaaaughh!")

If there's anything to be said for being an adult over being a teenager, it's that you have more choices. (Including wine.) But, that doesn't mean easier.

May. 15th, 2014 03:37 am (UTC)
Ahhh, yes! That is such a better way of explaining it. This train of thought can't stay on the track as long anymore without something else popping up.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Screw the antagonists, the obstacles, the critics; the people in your way. Be crazy, be insane, be completely bonkers, but do it because you want to. Shock the world, take away its collective breath, and stun everyone into silence. And may they all applaud.

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